Old “Twenty-Something” Soul

Old “Twenty-Something” Soul

“Why don’t you act your age?”

If I had a dollar for every time I’ve heard that, I’d save up just enough for a round trip to California and back. Now for a college student, or even young person like me, that’s A LOT of money. Most of the time, this expression is used for those who seem to be pretty immature. As for me, its quite the opposite. I’ve always seemed to be the one that was “disconnected” from my generation; obsessed with the fads and fashion of the past, thinking and sometimes wishing that I was apart of theirs rather than my own. The shallowness of the media seems to swallow us whole from the reality that we live in. I, myself, seem to get caught up in the cliché sayings, and popular memes; instead of focusing on what’s right in front of me. It’s ridiculous.

When speaking to friends and peers, some always make an emphasis on how I act “too old” and should learn to “live in the moment”. It came to a point where I felt out of place, and somewhat ashamed of attaining the mindset that I have. I began to question myself, and asking why I couldn’t have that “younger” mindset. Then, I began to wonder, Since when did attaining wisdom at a young age become so unacceptable?

Since I could remember, I have always been trying to run away from the things that make up who I am. I also remember, hoping and praying that I would someday live my life with wisdom. I prayed that I wouldn’t make the same mistakes of my loved ones, that I wouldn’t live my life along with the crowd. Since a young age, I have lived a very tumultuous life. Although unfortunate, I’ve come to the realization that I cannot change my past. I cannot change my experiences, nor should I be ashamed of them. So instead of sulking on what could have been, or living in the after effects of my low, and rather abusive life, why not take those experiences and learn from them? Because with learning comes growth, and through growth comes, knowledge, and with knowledge we attain wisdom.

  “You can choose to look at the glass as half empty, or half full..” (Anon). 

     It’s easy for me to look at life pessimistically, I think its almost safe to say that a majority of people do. I have experienced those consuming downs, where you feel that there is no point in continuing to live; bored of the same patterns that the wearies of life bring you. But then I remember all of the obstacles I have overcame in my life, and realized that my “half-empty” thinking is not only doing a disservice where I’ve been, but also to where I am going.

    So forgive me if I am not amused with the prodigious and mind numbing ideas of “living in the moment” solely by sitting on social media all day, clubbing, and overtly consuming alcohol every weekend (hell, even every damn day).. And just to be clear, I am NOT saying that enjoying these things are wrong, but its important for them to be enjoyed with moderation. I’m also not EXCLUDING myself as if I don’t indulge in these a little too much. This is something that I myself struggle to work on improve daily.

     I believe the key to life is looking past the capitalist trap that society places on the younger generation, which places a veil over our eyes. Places a veil over the truth to success in life not just financially, but also mentally and emotionally. If knowing the truth, and doing my best to steer away from that makes me an “old soul”, then so be it. Because I would not trade my growing knowledge and wisdom, for ignorance and complacency. Being an old soul should not be looked at as losing the fullness that life has to offer, but a gain to live life to the fullest.

-BeePoetic

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